Birthday Party BYOB Request

by Curt
(Tampa)

Dear Ms. Manners,
I recently received a birthday party invitation via Facebook. The invitation was sent by the birthday boy (adult male over 40) and the invite stated it was a party for both himself and a friend with who I am not acquainted. In the invite it stated to "BYOB". The party is at the home of my friend and I would like to celebrate with this friend.

My question is two fold: First, if I am being asked to BYOB do I still bring a birthday gift and if so do I also bring a gift to the other birthday person who I don't know? Second, is it tacky to ask people to BYOB to a party at one's home.

I would absolutely bring a birthday gift to a party and most likely I might bring a bottle of wine or liquor but that would be by my choice. I would never consider attending a dinner party without bringing wine or a gift.

I feel a little put off that I am being asked to bring my own liquor to an adult party of non-starving college students.

Personally, I would not invite adult mid age guests to a party and expect them to BYOB. Frankly, I would not even have the party if I could not afford to pay for liquor. Or, I would create a themed party such as "beer and wine" which I would pay for.

What is appropriate?

Signed,

Liquor miffed in Tampa!