Do the gentleman or the lady extend their hand for a handshake first?

by donna

i was taught from my father to always extend your hand to the man first to shake hands in social situations. That it is nt proper for a man to extend his hand first. my father attended a school for boys where manners and proper etiquette was strictly inforced. i told my daughter this when she was young and she got this wrong on a test in school. I am very upset about this. many people may not do this anymore and may not be percieved as rude however i think it is still the proper thing to do. Am i right Please tell me yes. thank you

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Jan 09, 2017
women shaking hands NEW
by: Anonymous

I might be wrong, but I feel a lady should never shake hands. It's more respectful to acknowledge a woman with a simple gesture of a man with a proper nod and a woman to do the same. Of course, both should say "pleased to meet you". Since the whole thing about equal rights movement for women, the less women and men use proper etiquette.

Mar 26, 2016
Hand shaking NEW
by: Anonymous

Doing my years in primary school we young boys were taught that a man should waits to see if a lady extends her hand and should not offer his first

Mar 22, 2016
Do the gentleman or the lady extend their hand for a handshake first? NEW
by: Anonymous

I feel assaulted by men who come up to me with their hands out as if I owe them a handshake. Men notoriously do not wash their hands after bathroom use and this is a very good way to pass disease.
Why can't they just say they are pleased to see me without grabbing for my hand or making me feel bad if I don't want to be touched? I am often put in the position of having to explain that I have a damaged immune system and are prone to catch things. This is more information that they are entitled to and an invasion of my privacy. Sometimes I say that I would prefer a hug to a handshake with which most comply. Either way I don't feel men should insist on women shaking their hands. The man should not extend their hand first,but what about men who don't want a woman to insist they shake hands? Perhaps hand shaking should be done away with as too common and too germy.

Feb 07, 2014
A Lady Extending Her Hand NEW
by: Anonymous

Can a lady extend her hand at a funeral receiving line prior to giving a male family member a hug?

Jul 29, 2013
Woman and men shaking hands NEW
by: Anonymous

When I grew up in the 1950's, social skills were taught in school. I remember being taught that it is the man who extends his hand to the woman first for the hand shake.

Aug 11, 2011
Shaking hands and more
by: Jill

We should be aware that Muslims usually will not shake the hand of an unrelated person of the opposite sex.

In Australia, most people will respond to an introduction with: "Pleased to meet you, [name]." In so doing, however, they are inadvertantly revealing their social class, as the higher social class (mind you, Australia is primarily a classless society in my opinion) respond with "How do you do, [name]." Sounds a bit odd, I know, but it's a fact. I think the same applies in Great Britain. Perhaps another reader can enlighten us.

Oct 25, 2010
Women first
by: Anonymous

I agree that it should be the woman who extends her hand first.

It is almost like you are giving permission. If a woman is uncomfortable with a man then she might not want that physical contact.

However in a business situation, it might be different.

I also agree that most people probably don't know this and you should not take offense if a man extends his hand.

I did not know anything about this... but common sense tells me women first.

Aug 16, 2010
It goes both ways, I suppose.
by: Cassandra

I have had several men extend their hands to shake mine, mostly in social interactions where business is involved. While I feel that it is polite to adhere to this rule, not many people are aware of it and I'm sure no offense is meant by men who extend their hands first. I've found that men who extend their hands to me are preferable to the ones who will only shake the hands of other men in a group and refer to me as "honey" or the more condescending "little lady".

Aug 13, 2010
Totally Agree
by: Eileen

I was always told that a woman always extends her hand first if she wants to shake the mans hand. That a man never assumes that a woman wants to shake his hand an offers his hand that it is ALWAYS up to the woman.

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