How do I say no to family members asking to give money to buy others Christmas presents? And is it really okay?

by Niki
(Minden, NV)

Christmas is just around the corner and I love, love to get gifts for my family and friends. I guess you could say I am the ultimate gift giver. I place a lot of thought into the presents I choose and put just as much thought into the wrapping of the presents.


I have been confronted with a situation that I am unable to turn into a positive light. My husband's family has asked us to "chip in" for presents for other family members. We have said that we have already thought of an idea and would like to buy our own gifts for others and yet, we get the begging and "please, oh please give us money to buy so and so a present".

Now I am giving money for a present for my mother-in-law and other family members that will not come from my heart. I do not even get the joy of picking out the present. I am having a hard time with this and am wondering if this is an okay practice? Why do I feel angry and sad?




Comments for How do I say no to family members asking to give money to buy others Christmas presents? And is it really okay?

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Mar 25, 2013
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It's a gift NEW
by: Anonymous

A gift comes from the heart. It's meant to give joy to both the giver and the receiver. I say, if it were me, I'd continue giving from my heart just the same as people say thank you even when they don't like the gift. A gift is not a requirement, it's meant as a token of emotion. I wouldn't worry about anyone but the person you're giving the gift to.

Feb 06, 2013
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Not good gifts? NEW
by: Anonymous

Maybe they did not like what you were giving them over the years and thought this might solve the problem without hurting your feelings. Maybe the gift they wanted to give would be much more useful and it was too expensive for just a couple to buy.

Maybe they felt they had to give gifts to you for all the gifts you buy. This can create a problem for this with financial worries.

Why not buy gifts for those who don't get gifts. Homeless shelters, shelters for abused women/men/children. Donate to Prison Fellowship. There are all kinds of places who need gifts - year round!

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