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How To Be A Lady

how to be an elegant lady
Ashley Judd plays a wonderful lady in the movie De-lovely

Interestingly, 'How to be a lady' is not something that comes naturally to us, nor is anyone born with.

I've read a quote somewhere that wisely states,

"Being a woman does not automatically make one a lady."

Why Be A Lady?

First of all, your world will be made more pleasant.

  1. You'll be so pleased with yourself that you spoke kindly and gently, you'll smile from within! Those beautiful manners will be reciprocated from others, treating you like royalty.

  2. Your royal etiquette makes the men in your life feel more like gentlemen, and you'll be amazed how civil and wonderful your time spent together, even in disagreement.

  3. People will love you, wherever you go, even the little dogs and cats. It is a great self-esteem booster!

  4. You will feel more beautiful, and you will even have the courage to graciously stand up for something you believe in, or for someone who has no voice.

  5. You will gain a relaxed sense of confidence, an ease about yourself. You will feel secure in yourself. You won't feel the need to impress or respond to bad manners with the same tit-for-tat. YOu are gracious.

  6. Whether conscious or by instinct, being a lady helps you be decisive and assured - of knowing how to go about your day, get around in life, what to do in every situation.

  7. Being a lady is about being kind. It is also about choosing to believe the best in others and yourself.

Ready to see what it takes to be one? It is easier than it looks, really. All it is really an extension of common sense.)

Misconceptions of Being A Lady

A lady has to know all the rules of etiquette.

A lady is boring, she doesn't speak what she really thinks.

A lady has to dress in all this conservative looking clothes from the 1900s.

A lady has to carry a hankerchief everywhere she goes.

A lady doesn't like sports.

A lady is never sexy.

Stumped? Let's hear more...

Teachings of 'How to be a Lady'
Originated From Royal Etiquette

A Little History of 'How To Be A Lady'

It all began with a little rules.

Back when kings and queens ruled the earth, etiquette was written for people who lived in the royal courts and castles on 'how to behave'. They were probably members of the royal family, privileged cousins and royal staff.

Fun fact: A little bird told me that the first etiquette rule was in french and it meant 'stay off the grass'!

It was there where the art of 'how to be a lady' has been studied, polished and refined. Guidelines were written, or should I say, loosely enforced rules about almost every topic under the sun. One example is of in a matter of greeting and socializing, who had the 'right' to speak first and who should not speak unless being spoken to. Other guidelines included how you should stand, bow, curtsey, what you should wear and how you should behave in the front of the king. See "History of How to be a Lady"

See also The Fading Art Of 'How To Be A Lady'

Being a Lady Today

What it Means to Be a Lady Today

Today, what it means to 'be a lady' is lost among the sea of messages of what one wears, what one talks about, who she hangs out with or where they dine, holiday, hang out.

That is hardly so.

From my years of study and obsession, I can say right now that being a lady is more than emulating the behaviours of a sophisticated and elegant lady, worse, if it's just because she has means!

For example, etiquette for a lady is often thought to be a bunch of rules. Instead, etiquette rules are not written for you to memorize but rather it births from a kind thought, or simply a more organized way of doing something.

Favourite Passage About Being A Lady

I love how Candice Simpson describes being a lady.(Abridged version)

Manners, attitudes, appropriate dress and social mores have changed so dramatically that the definition of being a lady has left everyone confused.

A lady by today's definition knows that educating herself in every way possible, from higher education to the common sense manners, empowers her to become a woman of accomplishment and poise. She knows it is not her dress size or the money she possess that brings her satisfaction in life.

A lady knows that beauty and wealth can be fleeting, but her inner character is the measure by which others will ultimately judge her as a person.

Her courtesies, the high esteem in which she holds herself and others, and her sincere words of praise and thoughtfulness will reflect her strong values and place her ahead in the minds and hearts of those who know her. Being thought of as a "lady" may be the one of the highest compliments a woman can receive in her life.

And last of all, no one is born a lady. You have to learn and BECOME one. So exercise a little patience and go through these bite-sized lessons together!

The Essence of Being A Lady

A Kind Heart

Being a lady is simply nothing more than extended manners to every part of your being, a way to be kind, an organized way to go about your life and interacting with people.

Manners are kindness. How to be a lady...is to be the kindest woman in the room. It is true elegance.

True, a lady should employ herself in personal grooming, dress well and learn etiquette. However if you are without a kind heart and thus without manners, people will see through your actions as fake unfortunately.

Bite Sized Lessons

  1. Bite sized lessons 'How To Be a Lady' Page One
  2. Bite sized lessons 'How To Be a Lady' Page Two
  3. Bite sized lessons 'How To Be a Lady' Page Three
  4. Bite sized lessons 'How To Be a Lady' Page Four
  5. Gestures that Ruin Your Elegant Appearance
  6. Read what it means to be an Accomplished Lady back in Jane Austen's Times
Thank you for reading this page!

You may like:

57 Lessons on Elegance

Polite Manners - Sayings and Inspirational Quotes

How to Be Lovely

Quick And Easy Elegant Tips

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    I'll be a wife and mother first, then First Lady - Jackie Kennedy