To be more tolerant

I have had very destructive people around me, from my parents to the people I chose to spend time with as an adult. I always knew that this behavior was wrong and did my best not to engage in it myself, from my earliest recollection, and as an adult I've learned to avoid interacting with people who are destructive after many painful lessons.

However, I have a very difficult time tolerating destructive behavior (rudeness, selfishness, ignorance, gossip, etc.) now in anyone long enough to even finish dinner. I also lack gracious acceptance for any success of those who treated me badly; since none of these people have ever apologized, the damage done was significant, and they continue to behave in a destructive manner, it upsets me to see them succeed believing that their treatment of another person is justified. I would prefer not to be angry. It is so inelegant! I hope to forget the trangressions of the past and ignore those that I encounter - and I will be sure it is as brief as possible - in the future.

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Jun 04, 2012
well done NEW
by: Anonymous

Dear Eunice,
I am sorry to hear of the difficult examples that you were set as a child and young adult. It is inspiring to know that you have cultivated your own ideals of elegant conduct, in spite of what you may have learned from your immediate environment. You sound sensible and protective of your self and your loved ones.
Your website is very enjoyable and inspiring to read. Keep up the good work.

May 19, 2012
Speaking poorly of others on an etiquette website? NEW
by: Anonymous

I've enjoyed your website today. I came upon it while searching for articles on how to be a lady. Thank you for your site! I subscribed it to my RSS feed. One thought on this article is that I was surprised to read your comments about your parents behaving poorly. Regardless of their behavior, do they not deserve the same respect you suggest we treat others with?

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