Victorian EtiquetteInterested in what Victorian etiquette used to be?  One thing's for sure is that manners and etiquette were ranked as high as education back in those days. They associated etiquette with status and wealth as well. Though times have changed and it would be not appropriate to try to enforce similar etiquette in our lives, it is worth knowing how the refined lived in a romantic era, where chivalry and gentility were prized and honoured. Victorian EtiquetteManners & Etiquette In Jane Austen's novel, "Pride and Prejudice", Mr Darcy was trying to write a letter to his sister but was constantly interrupted by his friend Mr Bingley's sister with her barrage of opinions on what to write in her letter. He simply said, (paraphrased) "Do allow me to convey your sentiments to my sister another time, I do not have room (in the letter) to do justice to your words." How completely civil is that? That became the pre-occupation of females during victorian times. They were also trained to devote themselves to meaningful work should they not marry for the rest of their lives.
Victorian EtiquetteGrooming Grooming No one came down to their breakfast in pajamas. A lady's hair was always tied up in a chignon, in a bonnet unless she is still very young. The ladies always dressed modesty, in good taste and in very feminine colours with beads, laces and ribbons. It was frowned upon otherwise.
Victorian EtiquettePosture & PoisePosture and carriagewas of utmost importance. Ladies were trained to carry themselves well, from the way they lift their dress as they cross a step, just ever so slightly. Other things also include, how to stand, sit, walk. How to take the arm of a man escorting them to their next place of destination, eat, speak, greet, dance etc. They were taught to have poise, to gesture elegantly, if they need to, never be in a hurry or seem flustered. Good posture and gracefulness were seen as beauty. Victorian EtiquetteHow To Be A LadyLearning to become a lady with beautiful etiquette was placed as equal to education and was placed with a heavy social responsibility in Victorian days. In Victorian times, the true foundation of female loveliness is a natural beauty. Beauty must be natural, with fair and clear skin due to good health, rosy cheeks due to excitement and a zest for life, interesting eyes due to a sharp, educated mind. Dress must be modest in feminine styles and colours are much preferred. There is definitely a greater distinction in dress between men and women in Victorian times. There was no room for ambiguity. Victorian EtiquetteThe Art Of ConversationWith less options to entertain themselves and guests, the art of conversation was highly esteemed. Their social calendar would include , Afternoon tea , balls and dances , traveling to visit friends and family, going on walks, sports, watching someone paint or draw, hearing someone read, playing the piano, and means of elegant entertaining through hosting teasand dinners or hosting balls Victorian Manners EtiquetteHistoryLadies were judged by their manners on their upbringing, class status, their family's wealth, their education, the kind of man (or class of a man) they would be entitled to marry. It was almost as though if they did not devote much attention or study to their refinement , they would most certainly not get married or will not be able to "marry well". A good example of these are echoed in Jane Austen's novels, Pride and Prejudice, and Sense and Sensibility. You might also be interested in: Ms Manners - Everyday Manners  Return to the top of Victorian Etiquette Go back to homepage Tags: Victorian manners, Victorian Etiquette, Victorian ladies, Victorian era, victorian women “A truly elegant taste is generally accompanied with excellency of heart.”
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