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How to Develop Poise Learning how to develop Poise is like learning to put make up on but for the body! While you put make up to present your best face forward, poise is putting your personal best presentation to the world. So far I haven't found anything - any book, any class, any trainer that gives an in depth training on Poise. I would love to see a society of poised confident women (us!) so meanwhile I am doing some research and developing some material. Join the mailing list to be updated! Our goal is to communicate composure, dignity, respect and graceful movement through poise. Here are some basic steps on how to develop poise.   Dress Your BestDress your best to always give yourself confidence that you already look great. There is a pyschological effect that takes place. Your body responds to your thoughts and projects how you feel. Videotape YourselfMost of our digital cameras or cell phones have that handy little function these days. Have someone videotape your walk, the way you sit, stand, talk, laugh, eat, drink. It is throught this awareness that gives us a better understanding. That understanding will help us edit both consciously and subconsciously. Study the Way that You WalkThere is a misconception that girls think they have to strut like a model for a beautiful walk. Get rid of the supermodel walk. It is reserved for very few occasions, definitely not in your everyday walk. My dance teacher once told me that for graceful posture, imagine a string in the middle of your chest putting upwards (gently) without over arching your back. To be honest with you, after so many years, I'm still working on my walk! I have made progress in correcting some bad habits. So be patient with yourself. About half a century ago, girls were taught how to walk. These lessons existed in schools, not specialty or finishing schools, but everywhere. I wonder why it is not longer a requirement to learn how to walk. Learning to walk is important. It teaches us how to breathe, sit and use our bodies ergonomically. It is for good health, helps our self confidence and esteem. It definitely projects elegance. See also Posture Photos. Part of Audrey Hepburn's charm I believe attributed to her very beautiful walk. It is certainly not easy to correct your walk and learn how to walk beautifully with dignity and grace. If you watch movies from the Victorian times, actresses had to portray perfect carriage and posture. I'm sure you already know and have seen how ridiculous it looks to be perfectly dresssed but dragging one's feet. Stylists can dress you well but no one can be poised for you. Elegant Posture With Extra Help While the 'string in the middle of your chest' helps, I also wear a back brace from time to time for my shoulders to keep them relaxed, down and not rolled forward. I use a lumbarwear as well - it is kind of a girdle that works on my lower back. I don't use corsets but it is no wonder Victorian women at that time always had great posture and poise. Exercise For Poise and PostureI've noticed that people who exercise regularly do not seem to have problems of attaining good posture. With good posture, half the battle is won to achieve an elegant poise. Dancing helps too. Especially ballet and ballroom dancing. Keep Your Arms To Your SidesAnother tip of how to develop poise is to keep your arms close to your sides as much as you can, in a relaxed way. When I took posture lessons, my instructor told us to constrict movements from your elbows as much as possible. Obviously don't stick your arms like glue to your slides. If your shoulders are hunched upwards, that's too close.Never Ever Rush Or Be In A HurryTo be poised to never seem like you're in a hurry, no matter what calls for it. Never walk too quickly, strut making loud sounds of your heels clicking against the boardwalk. Do not eat in a hurry, no matter how hungry or zip up your purse in a fast way. Be as quiet as possible and unhurried. No slamming of car doors, house doors, fridge door. Obviously, this is harder than it looks especially in the fast paced society that we live in. If you find yourself hurrying everywhere, it is either due to poor time management or you could be simply doing too much. Slow down, select (root word of elegance is select) - elegance is afterall, a way of life. Be GentleThere is a certain kind of chic gentleness in being poised. Gentle and elegant gestures increases our beauty. Clothes are not the only 'covering' we wear. It is much easier to be gentle when you are kind and tender. Gentle is an all emcompassing word. If you're gentle to little animals, you'll be gentle towards someone's feelings. You'll also probably not slam things around. Smile Much, Laugh SoftlySimilarly as gentleness is concurrent with devloping poise, being poised means having a gentle smile (ready and often) as well as soft harmonious laughter. Knee-slapping, hand-clapping, back slapping or laughter with mouth wide open does not contribute to poise. Laughing very loudly especially in a restaurant is not acceptable as well. Watch Your Hands - Do Not Touch Or FidgetSome of us have problems keeping our hands to ourselves. The problem of fidgety hands and wanting to touch everything, do something with our hands could be attributed to the problem of being 'unable to relax'. If you want to develop poise, train yourself to keep them relaxed and do yourself. Don't be digging into your purse, looking at your iphone every 30 seconds, touching your face, hair. It is good to practice restraint. See also Elegant Gestures. Have A Deep Respect Of Others and Things Around YouI've observed that women with elegant poise seem to have a deep respect of others and things around them. For instance, they tend to leave a place the way it was when they entered. They are not ones to touch things in another person's house. If they borrowed something, it would be in the exact condition (or better sometimes) when they received it.They'll never be one of those that leave the hotel rooms in a complete mess just because they don't have to clean up. They won't drive a rented a car in a way they won't drive their own. You'll never catch them saying, "who cares? It is rented." They'll also never steal blankets from airplanes etc. See also How to be Classy. Conclusion on How To Develop PoiseHow to Develop Poise Summary
I hope you've enjoyed reading my article on How to Develop Poise! I'll be here for you rooting for you all the way. :) Thank you for reading 'How to Develop Poise'!
Go back to An Elegant Poise. You might be interested in: 1. Why We Should Develop Poise 2. For Good Posture - Strengthen Your Core 3. Correcting Bad Posture - How to Improve Posture 4. Ballet for Elegance - Good Posture & Developing Gracefulness Return from How to Develop Poise to Elegant Woman Home |
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