Marriage Proposal EtiquetteMarriage Proposal Etiquette - the order of procession Many relationships before I got proposed to, I've only watched very romantic marriage proposals done Hollywood style. It's probably with a Tiffany's ring, done on bended knee, sometimes at a surprise party. There will be cheers, hugs, and tears of joy. The ring fits perfectly, there are no slips in preparation, the music plays, the birds sing, everyone is happy. Its only when I started approaching that age where suddenly, I wondered what was my ring size, what kind of diamond i liked, the cut, the band, what will my parents think, what will his parents think? Most of all, does he even have a clue on how to propose? There is also the issue of proposing. There is a lot more preparations involved. Aside from all the issues from sizing your finger in secret, trying to predict what kind of diamond you like, whether you're the sort of person that needs to choose the exact diamond you want and the works. Not to mention the consequences of the proposal. Where are you going to live? Do you have a house yet? How are we going to afford the wedding? Are you ready to get married? Thus, the need for an elaborate understanding of Marriage Proposal Etiquette . Afterall, etiquette simply means a kind way and a well-thought out way of doing things, like a sequence, almost like a procedure. I decided to do this post because I remembered having girlfriends tell me that their boyfriends asked them 'how to propose?' in a larger sense. Many get confused with the wedding ring and the engagement ring. (Read=Do I propose with the wedding ring? Oh you mean there are two rings? Which finger do I size, left hand or right hand?) I have to admit that I was confused too. There seem to be so much involved just moving on to the next stage. But don't diss the customs, they are designed for a memorable life! Adapted from my other Engagement Ring Etiquette Post. I've just pasted it here for easy reading. I've added a few bits too to illustrate the correct way to propose. Marriage Proposal Etiquette The Order of Procession After dating for at least four to six months, your partner decides he wants to marry you, assuming no family objections during the relationship. I.e. Your relationship must be known to your family. Not only informing them when you are about to take it to the next level. As the future bride, you can play a part by introducing him to the family. He goes to a jeweler and begin the quest for his diamond (or precious stone). He researches and studies his budget and what he wants to give you and finally purchases a diamond. His jeweler then gives a clasp-on temporary ring, where the diamond is clasps on in a nice velvet box. He keeps it with him and proposes to you according to how he would like to propose. Keeping in mind your personality and character, he should consider when proposing. If you hate to be put on the spot, he shouldn't go up on stage of a big concert and propose using the microphone. Once you accept, both of you make a trip to the jeweler to get your ring set according to your finger size and preference and your band designed. Alternatively, he finds a creative way to get your ring size. Either he measures your finger when you are asleep, or meets your favourite jeweler to ask about your details. Once I went to a jeweler to look at some jewelry, while I was looking at something else, my fiance had a very quick private talk with my jeweler to get my ring size. This was a shop I have not been before and yet, the very smart jewelry instantly could tell my finger size. This is to illustrate that with a glance, the jeweler could accurately estimate my ring size. They have been sizing so many fingers that their guesses are accurate or not far off. Smart Hint! Tell this story to your future husband to show how smart jewelers are. It is also very helpful if you very strategically let him know your ring size. Once he gets your ring size, he can buy the ring immediately without having you to get it re-set or size. I only encourage this if the groom truly knows his bride's tastes very well - such as a preference over thinner bands, the diamond set high or low, the tall band, the crusted band etc. Marriage Proposal Etiquette Essential Before proposing, he sets aside time to talk to his parents about his decision to marry you. Depending on circumstances and his relationship with his parents, this could be done in a phone call or dinner. Sometimes, it may take a while. If you are aware that he is going to talk to his parents, be patient and try not to think too much into it. Occasionally, there may be sticky subjects that are not because of you but a change in his status. For instance, sometimes he is running the family business and getting married would mean a request to spend more family time. Arrangements must be made to get extra help etc etc. After gaining his parent's blessings, he then proceeds to consult yours. Once he gets your parent's blessing or permission, he can plan on how to propose. Obviously, he does not really need permission to marry you in this day and age. But it is a nice and elegant idea and your parents will definitely appreciate it. Disagreements? Sometimes disagreements may come, or perhaps there are conflicting views when to get married. Example, "My daughter is too young" etc, "Are you going to move to another country?"... Graciously work through them with honest, kind, open communication. If there is no compromise on each part, have a good think and follow your heart. Marriage Proposal Etiquette Alternative Less Romantic, More Practical He speaks to his parents about marrying you, then asks for your parents' permission to marry you. Once that is clear, he takes you to view some rings, discussing his budget with you. You select your favourite ring and everyone is happy. This depends on personalities of the couple. If this arrangement makes you happy, that is all that matters! Marriage Proposal EtiquetteSearch for more Marriage Proposal Etiquette!
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